back to school and other stuff....

How does the weather seem to know when the kids are about to go back to school? I woke up this morning to a familiar gray sky, carrying moisture from the ocean to our sometimes arid Inland Valley. When I was young, school always started after labor day. By that time of year things near the ocean, where I grew up, are beginning to cool down and the wind carries just a hint of cool moisture as it rides over mildly warm air. It is ironic that something as simple as air can trigger a memory, a feeling, an emotion, a response. When it is time to head, "Back to School" there is an interesting parallel that exists between the new opportunities that are around every corner and the comfort of the return to routine familiarity.

This year, not only are the kids going back to school, I am returning to school as well. I am used to supporting my two offspring as they anxiously head off to the great unknown that is whatever grade they are getting ready to start. I am NOT used to being the one who has to worry about
meeting new classmates,
             worrying if I can handle my schedule,
                       insecure about getting lost on campus (or in my case, in the hospital)
                                          or finding my way around. I am certainly NOT used to doubting my abilities,

and yet, that is exactly what I am finding myself doing.

Now, presuming I am not   a rationale adult who has learned through her mistakes, my apprehension and insecurity about matriculating helped me to recognize how much stress my kids actually must be experiencing. We adults know that school is not everything. But to our children, their world revolves around it.

Despite all of this,

I love it. I love the smell of new books, binder paper, pencil lead, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, new school clothes, backpacks and lunch boxes. I am honestly enjoying every moment of it, as I know all to well, it will be over. Kendra has already made the transition to adulthood and so I will savor every moment of Dylan's last 5 years.....even the procrastination that will inevitably take place, the tests that will be crammed for, the PE clothes that will be forgotten, the lunch money that will have to be dropped off and the conversations about peer groups, wise choices and being a good friend that will be had.

Welcome back to school!